A few weeks ago we talked about Habits – about thinking about the persona you want to be and then making the appropriate choices – whenever you are faced with a “difficult” option!
This week I bring you self-sabotage! We start off with the best of intentions, but somehow get derailed. And the biggest culprit – yourself!
Denise Duffield-Thomas, author of Get Rich Lucky Bitch (one of my Books of 2020) talks about money and success. It is her contention that we can all be “rich” (whatever that means to you and that it is our habits and mindset that hold us back.
We can (and should) put in place good money habits – one of which is gratitude around money. So – every time you receive money (or, say a voucher or a discount) one needs to recognise and express gratitude. She is also a big fan of logging Every Single Penny that goes in or out – which you are hopefully doing for your business anyway – but should also be doing for your personal finances!
One of her recent “Chill and Prosper” podcast episodes dealt with Self-sabotage. I’ll be honest – she’s maybe not everyone’s cup of tea! – you need to be strong to listen to the opening jingle – but it’s worth it!
It’s not enough to start (good) new habits – you need to rid yourself of any old behaviours that are not serving you or your business.
Self-awareness is the key, and you could be doing things that just aren’t helping you to make the most of yourself.
One of the behaviours she talks about is “boredom”.
We can get bored of doing the same things over and over again – especially if we don’t really like them (what do you like doing in your business day, and what do you hate doing?). So maybe you keep doing some marketing and it “doesn’t work” – or it just seems tedious to keep on posting on social media or whatever?
Or you may have a new idea – and it doesn’t take off immediately and so you give up!
Consistency is boring but it is also necessary, and you need to show up wherever it is you need to show up and you need to just be there time after time.
Networking is another great example of this. Dropping into a networking meeting occasionally and expecting everyone to remember you just does not work! Be there – and be engaged and interested when you do.
Are you the sort of person who’s super full of energy all the time? Well don’t worry if you are not – because not everyone (anyone?) is? And if you think no-one else procrastinates – they sure do!
What to do about it?
Let’s find ways / systems to create the consistency. Use the times you ARE full of energy to write your blogs, or create your posts.
1. You must know by now that I am a huge fan of the Weekly Plan! You may also remember that I talk about the times when you know you are at your best (and the places) – so make the most of those and schedule in your creative / thinking / doing time when you know you have the best chance of getting things done!
Don’t schedule stuff for a Friday afternoon (I don’t) if you know that by then you will be tired and demotivated! If you have a calendar system for people to book time with you then control that – if you want Wednesday mornings to be your time for doing stuff then for goodness sake don’t open up that time for people to book an appointment with you!!!
It’s your choice!
2. And then there is the other self-sabotage pitfall – perfection.
- Oh I need to tweak my website
Oh my blog isn’t quite ready to publish
Oh the time’s not right to launch that
IT WILL NEVER BE READY
IT WILL NEVER BE THE EXACT RIGHT TIME
IT WILL NEVER BE PERFECT!!
3. Don’t break what works,
Yes – I know I often encourage people to do something new – and that’s cool – but not at the expense of things that already work! Some business owners seem to flit from one “great idea” to the next – with the result that you never really quite know what they do! Do not sabotage you core business by trying something new!
New things can be used to attract more of your ideal client – but as a way to get them to the good stuff. But everything you do needs to relate.
I do understand that people need to make money but trying to communicate two completely separate ideas to your audience won’t really work – you will just confuse people. Or – worse – people engage with you for your alternative idea and then you can’t convert them to your main business offering. You have then potentially lost them forever.
Denise talks about her money bootcamp – her flagship product. She has never launched any alternative- but she has her podcast, newsletter, books etc – the goal being, on every occasion, to convert people to the bootcamp! (so yes it’s an advert in the podcast).
A final word on procrastination
And one to bear in mind when you start to set new habits.
BEWARE of the “good intentions” which can hijack you – you don’t need to have a perfect house (for example) before you sit down to write your blog. Or it may even be a business activity which you decide is a higher priority!
Your biggest friend is – Accountability!
It’s part of the point of the Pomodoro sessions that I run – the attendees state at the beginning what they are going to get done, and then report back at the end. They could practise the Pomodoro technique themselves (and many do) but the accountability makes a huge difference.
FInd yourself an Accountability buddy (or get a coach)!
Making yourself accountable for things happening is one of the best ways to stop yourself self-sabotaging!
Get in touch with me if you’d like to chat.